The Greatest Way to Understand People

Hey friends,

Someone is talking to you.

You’re nodding.

You’re looking right at them.

But in your mind… you’re already preparing what you’re going to say next.

Let me ask you something honest.

Are you really listening?

If we’re being honest, we’ve all done it.

Someone is sharing something important, and while they’re talking, we’re already forming our response.
Solving the problem.
Preparing advice.
Thinking about what we want to say next.

But here’s something I’ve learned over the years.

People don’t just want answers.

They want to be understood.

And this week, as we continue our March series on Being A Person Worth Following, we’re talking about one of the most powerful relationship principles I know:

If you want to understand people… learn to listen.

Not too long ago, a friend of mine was telling me about a challenge he was facing in his business.

And I did what many of us do.

I jumped straight into “fix it mode.”

Ideas.
Strategies.
Suggestions.

After about a minute, he stopped me.

Then he said something I’ll never forget.

“Brock… I’m not asking you to solve it.
I just need someone to hear me.”

In that moment, I realized something important and uncomfortable.

I hadn’t been listening to understand.

I had been listening to respond.

And those are two very different things.

Every person you meet is carrying something.

A worry.
A fear.
A quiet burden they haven't told many people about.

And many people feel like no one truly hears them.

But when someone feels understood…

something changes.

Walls soften.
Trust grows.
Connection forms.

That’s why listening is one of the most powerful leadership skills in the world.

Because people don’t follow those who talk the most.

They follow those who understand the most.

Even Jesus Modeled This

One of the most striking things about the Gospels is how often Jesus asked questions.

Think about that.

The Son of God… asking questions.

Why?

Because questions invite people to share their hearts.

And listening invites people to feel seen.

He met people exactly where they were.

And that kind of presence changes lives.

So let me ask you something this week.

Who in your life might feel unheard right now?

A spouse.
A child.
A coworker.
A friend who keeps saying they’re “fine.”

What if the greatest gift you could give them this week…

was simply your attention?

This week, choose one person.

When they talk, slow down.

Put the phone down.
Look them in the eyes.

Do not give attention to anything else around you.
Listen like what they’re saying truly matters.

Because it does.

When people feel understood, they feel valued.

And when people feel valued, they trust you.

And trust is what makes someone worth following.

It often starts with something very simple.

Someone finally feeling heard.

Gratefully Serving People Who Love Extraordinary Chocolate,

Your friend,
Brock

P.S. Sometimes the sweetest message you can send someone is simply: “I’m listening.”

And when you want to remind someone they are worthy, valued, and loved, You know what to do…a Dulci gift box says it beautifully.